Cancer Survivor

Time Warp

October 18, 2009

Science fiction describes a phenomenon known as “time warp” that somehow forms a time and space continuum which bends, folds, or warps itself together creating a dual state undetected by the average observer. For instance, in one dimension time might rush forward at the rate of a year per second while in another plan time eerily suspends in a virtual standstill. I believe that sorrow, suffering, and a host of other ailments are catalysts that force humans into that “time stands still” reality. It’s the only way to explain how I can be at home convalescing at a snail’s pace while my loved ones race into the future by leaps and bounds. Their dizzying pace leaves a faint blur in their wake. In my best Yoda voice I warn, “Too fast you are going. Have accident, you will.” The Jedi’s, from the imagination of George Lucas, possess the secret of the time warp…jumping back and forth between continuums. One episode you see Yoda blissfully contemplating life on a distant planet and the next he’s traveling at warp speed to destroy the Death Star or save a princess.

But is time warp just a thing of science fiction? What evidence exists to illustrate this “dual state” phenomena? 1) During the holidays, take your kids to visit their grandparents. And you’ll hear Mimi say, “Oh my, just last year you could sit on my lap. Now you can carry me on your back.” To little Susie, last Christmas seems like a decade ago. For Grandma time whirled by, while for Susie time crept ever so slowly. Or 2) Offer to assist your child with homework (preferably math). Like me, you’ll proceed to methodically do the assignment in long hand, taking just a few hours of your time. But then uber-child walks in, pulls out a computer, and hits a series of keys to find the answer in seconds. You remain stuck in an outdated era while they exist in a new fangled generation. Both evidence of this strange time warp.

So last week a dear friend emailed and challenged me to stop being uber-Lenya. After reading my blog about being A-type and a heat seeking missile, she felt I must move more into the “stand still” time warp. To be honest, I thought that I already was moving in slow motion. But in truth, I can’t help but push the envelope…even in illness. But changing time warps is not for amateurs. It takes great stamina and acumen to leave light-speed for chillax mode. The untrained padawan hits a couple of walls and stumbles through some crash landings before getting it just right.

This week I had one of those hiccups. As I told you, my lower digestive track is wacked. There is a narrowing of the incision site. I have colitis. And there is something external to the colon causing pressure. Most of Tuesday night I was up and vomiting profusely. By the AM I had unbearable cramps. By 8AM I could barely lift my head. By the time my dad got me to the doctor’s office, Dr. Ampuero said, “You were just minutes from being admitted to the hospital.” Through my dad’s sage advice and divine intervention things turned just in time. But Wednesday I had another colonoscopy, which confirmed the above diagnosis. This Wednesday I’ll have a CT to determine the identity of the unknown entity pressuring my colon. Today I have blood work. I am fully in the life at the speed of jello time continuum. I don’t plan on flying anytime soon.


21 thoughts on “Time Warp

  1. I never liked jello anyway, and now I know why!!Praying for you, Lenya…"Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Shen, and called its name Ebenezer/lit. Stone of Help, saying, "Thus far the LORD has helped us."I Samuel 7:12

  2. oh, precious lenya…even in all of the pain & illness & unknowns you write so beautifully & still take the time to let those of us who love you know what is happening…that is so unselfish & loving of you…thank you much!as for uber-lenya…as i am going through radiation for breast cancer after 2 surgeries (4 treaments down, 30 to go) i have been using you as my compass…on days i don't have the energy to get up, i do because you do…i never miss bible study because you are my compass…at dion's last tuesday i told one of your dear friends you were my compass & she said then i would probably kill myself trying to keep up with you, 'uber lenya', she said it with a smile & much love for you and me…so you just be you…i have the perfect opportunity now to lie around & 'swoon' & have people wait on me but it's just not me…if i can breathe, i can move…so take a break, but if you're UBER then BE! i'm a lifelong cheerleader & i cannot seem to give up that role even though people tell me to stop…God made us different & i'm so thrilled that He gave me you as a guide in so many areas of my life…i do love you, rebecca

  3. Lenya you are lovedwe love you so much and God loves your so much more.we are praying for you and your family as poor body going through all this stuff.colitis is not fun either my dad had it and i know others as well it will get of my girlfriend had a surgery because she actually had a blockage in her intestines because of scar tissuepraying for God's hand of grace mercy, peace and healing upon husband and i have been at non stop pray for you and sweet daisy too.God has put you on our hearts daily we love you He will help you …….

  4. Lenya,I have committed to praying for you, Skip, Nate and Janae daily for the rest of 2009. I am reminded of Jesus' words when I read your heart's cry. In John 12:27 he says, " Now My soul is troubled, and what shall I say? Father, save Me from this hour', But for this purpose I came to this hour. Father, glorify Your name." Clearly you are in good company and glorifying God in your own suffering. I pray that the presence of the Holy Spirit overflows in you and that you find rest in His arms. Much love in Him, Rebecca

  5. Lenya,(Kelsey's mom Here)You are an amazing woman of God. Always rememeber that God never changes, He is in control, He never leaves or forsakes His own, He loves you with an everlasting love and He is always fair! Despite the pain and difficulty, may God's gace take you through, that you may say of Him "My Fortress, my God, my Strong Tower, has brought me through again!You are greatly loved and respected by many. The many prayers on your behalf, are as incense to God, and your tears are being saved in a bottle. Please keep your eyes and heart set on HIM and you will be in His perfect peace that passes all understanding. God's unchanging love be with you always.His mercies endure forever. I love you sister in Christ. God has you in the palm of His Amazing and powerful hand!! Hold on tight and be as a child in His arms!God Bless you and know that we are praying and standing in the gap for a precious one of God's chldren!!!!He loves you so much and so do we!!In His Gracious Grip,Lydia Hoppman

  6. Little Yoda has nothing on you, Lenya! The Lord is taking you light-years into His presence and warp speed glimpses into His love.Even through this firey trial our God uses you as an inspiration to so many lives! As slow as man is to diagnosis a problem, God can heal it within nano-seconds. Time is nothing to our Lord. Keep living in His presence, by His heavenly minutes.I will continue to pray for your comfort,strength and healing, but be encouraged that you are of great use to the Lord in being a blessing to so many,even in those 'time standing still' moments. love ya princess Lenya:)

  7. Couldn't sleep so instead of counting sheep, I'm talking to the Shepherd. He brought you to mind and I'm asking Him to hold you in the hollow of His hand, and while you're resting there, that in your spirit He will lift you up on eagle's wings and set you high above your pain and troubles. That's the amazing thing about our mind! We can skitter here and anywhere without ever moving a muscle! In our women's group, we're claiming a Scripture verse into each other's lives each week. This week it's 2 Peter 1:3-4. And I pray this for you dear sister:"His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and goodness. Through these He has given us His very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption in the world caused by evil desires."Love and prayers… Helen

  8. Hi LenyaDeut 31:6 Be strong and of good courage, do not fear nor be afraid of them, for the Lord your God , He is the one who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you. I have had colitis, I found putting a hot water bottle on the pain helped. Lots of love Angix

  9. I continue to pray for you during this difficult time. I too have been dealing with my daughters illness. It is amazing how God comforts us so we can be a comfort to others. Gayle

  10. As I read your blog and comments by those who are following and love you I was wishing I could come up with a clever comment that would unite us. What I mean is, I watched a U-tube video the other day where someone came suggested using sign language to thank military persononel in uniform for their service. A slight jesture that indicates to the person how thankfull we are that they chose to serve our country. I would like to think of a clever comment (sign) that us bloggers could type on here to let you know how much we care about you and that your in our prayers. After all Rush Lymba listeners know exactly what to say, "ditto". So here goes, you have always been an example to all of us of the Proverbs 31 woman, so when I type Proverbs 31 this is what it means.I am:P – prayingr – robustlyo – onv – vivaciouse – expectationsr – regardingb – battles – solution31 (every day of the month)but if there is someone out there with a better idea….that would be great too!!Love you!Proverb 31Renee

  11. Dear Lenya,Whether you're uber or in time-standing-still mode, I love you and pray for you always. I have found I've been in the same situation for quite some time . It can be frustrating, but at the same time, God is telling us there are times of rest. Times to regenerate ourselves, physically and spiritually…God has said He never gives us more than we can handle. He loves you more than you'll ever know. This trial seems to be a heavy one for you, though you've been a blessing to many of us who love you. So, no matter that we don't know why or what, God knows exactly what His plans are for you and me. You once told me to ask for patience and I said that only means He'd give me more to test me. So I now turn it around to say, "patience, dear Lenya. Be uber when you can, then rest a little while. Continuing to send my love and prayers for you and your family.Love always with prayers for healing,Joan Rooney

  12. Lenya, I would not be so arrogant as to think I could offer you any new words of encouragement that you haven't already heard a thousand times by now. But I must tell you, that because of your courage and faith in God, I was able to get on my knees and believe in God's healing touch. 3 wks ago my 9 yr granddaughter, Aaliyah was dx'd with a sarcoma and "amputation" was the new word she learned during the Dr's visit. She was sent to a specialist for the procedure, but before her appointment I had emailed Calvary of Albuquerque and asked for prayer, I also had a chain of believers across the country praying for her. Healing or not, I wanted her to not be afraid. When her biopsy was performed last Tues, the specialist could only find a sac of infection! She is now back in school with her classmates and was caught doing cart wheels by her mom! I feel the same in my heart for you as I did for her. God hears us all in petition for your healthy recovery and to hold Skip's "arms up" to stay strong. God bless you Lenya!With much love, Becky Gidcumb

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